Triquerta – Katja (PB)
Here comes PB’s character. I will comment in English since the character description is in English.
Background
Being the offspring of a deban adventurer and a katian prostitute, life did not start of easy for Katja ending up in an orphanage shortly after her birth. Her earliest memories is of the harsh and poor environment of the orphanage located in lanticka she realized later on.
In the following years, she learned the streets of lanticka having to steal and beg sometimes to earn food on the table for the day, seeing as the orphanage was crowded and rarely enough food for everyone.
She did not make a lot of friends living there and most would just be considered accomplices for survival in this filthy place, although she seemed very clever and quickly picked up on most of the things the older children taught her. When not busy with making a living for herself she mostly kept to her own and rarely taking the initiative to make friends or playing with the others, which somewhat gave her a rumour of being moody and strange.
In the later years of her stay in the orphanage she was one of the taller and brighter of the children staying there, even taller than most of the boys, many speculated that it must be because of her possible deban heritage seeing as her hair was almost raven black with only small tints of brown here and there making it into a very unique and exotic hair colour, the hair was also very wild and sprawled in many directions even if one of the caretakers at the orphanage tried to comb the hair, it usually looked as wild and natural in a day or two.
She would have been a very pretty young girl with fair and smooth skin and her cute face with those mesmerizing deep green eyes, if it was not for all the raggedly uncomfortable clothes and dirt.
One day when being chased by a storekeeper for stealing some fruit, she found herself making a wrong turn and ran straight into a garden or maybe a small park of some sorts, she tried to hide behind some thick bushes although she knew that hiding was something she never mastered as well as some of the other children, maybe because she was clumsy or simply did not care as much when she occasionally played hide and seek with the others.
She was in luck, seeing as the shopkeeper somehow missed the narrow turn into this small park, while being her with something to eat she decided to take a look around in this park while eating. She quickly realized that this place felt really untouched and it somehow appealed to her very strongly, finding a sense of peace amongst the untouched nature she quickly developed a liking to it and decided that this would be her special place.
Months passed and katja started spending more and more time in this small park, eating and occasionally sleeping there when the weather allowed. She started to see herself as an unofficial caretaker of this small patch of nature, realizing that she had quite a knack for handling the nature and the surrounding plant life, it was weird since no one had ever taught her things like this but it came very naturally for some reason. Even some of the creatures in this park dared to approach her when they realized she had food which she sometimes shared when being lucky getting a bit extra from stealing.
As time passed and katja grew, she realized that when she gets older and is able to get out of this filthy town which she disliked very much with all the people in the streets looking down on you like a piece of trash or some of the other men seeing you as a piece of meat which sometimes meant running from. No, she was going to seek out the real nature, untouched and unharmed by man and stay as far away as possible from these dirty technological towns.
Days and weeks passed and things were going good, she was faster, taller and in pretty good physical shape for being a orphan and she was probably one of the best nowadays to steal and not getting caught. Although she rarely talked or played with the others she sometimes gave some food to the younger ones as she knew how harsh it can be to survive and she really felt sympathy for them.
One day she saw a robed man on the street seemingly occupied in an conversation with a shopkeeper, he seemed like a easy catch, seeing as he was a bit chubby and she saw a fat purse hanging around his waist belt. She made a run for it, everything went perfect and she was already plenty of steps away with the fat purse in her hand smiling to herself.
Suddenly a wind came from nowhere that swept her feet off the ground falling helplessly on the hard dirty street. Before she even had realized what happened the robed fat man was upon her and had restrained her in a strong grip that she could not break free from. The man was furious and said that thieves should be hanged, but he would show mercy by only punishing her with a mutilation of her thieving hand. She struggled hard to escape this mans grip while walking towards the local authorities office, but it was stronger than anything she had ever escaped from before. Arriving at the office, the man explained the situation and the officers simply nodded and agreed that such punishment was suitable for a wicked thief like her.
And just like that they put her hand on an execution block and brought forth a well honed axe to meet out justice, the guard holding the axe raised it above his head and took a deep breath, while giving the officer one last glance that was met with an approving nod. She pleaded for mercy but no one listened too her sobbing for mercy, and just like that the axe fell with great speed and power, closing her eyes while sobbing she thought this was it, but all of the sudden she heard a sharp stop coming from the voice of the robed man and she opened her eyes just in time to see a strange glow from the mans hands, she had no idea what that was and at the same time she felt a sharp pain from her wrist as the axe hit her, she screamed in pain and agony but realized that the axe had stopped just digging into her wrist a little, it would probably leave a small scar but it was better than having no hand at all. The man had somehow stopped the axe from cutting off her hand even though he stood far away from the man with the axe, she did not know how or why, but she could hear the man and the officer talk and the man mentioned something about special, while nodding towards her.
The wound was quickly tended to and the bleeding stopped pretty quickly, the man approached after the conversation with the officer, this man explained to her that she was now under his custody and that she was going to another place were individuals like herself was taken care of.
The man had brought her to the inn he was staying at, also she had been informed that she was a mage, as the man himself was, she thought this was a ridiculous statement, although she had no idea what a mage really was or what this place magicka was, at first she just thought this man was out to own her, she had heard horrible rumours of these kinds of things before at the orphanage, she even tried escaping a couple of the times, but this man seemed to have anticipated such things and was always a step ahead, escape seemed impossible.
She felt anger and helplessness, this man was going to rob her of her dream to go out and seek nature, the man just smiled at her when she mentioned these kinds of things and claimed that were she was going, nature would exist, more than she ever had dreamed of. She obviously thought this was a lie but she had little choice than to follow this mage and endure all of his tests, he claimed that she had a strong marchon, whatever that is she thought.
Finally the day came when a boat arrived in the ports of lanticka, the boat the man had said was the ticket out of here to magicka the home of the mages, where she would be trained as a mage.
Vision
Katja has grown into an exceptional beauty and quite tall for being a katian with her long slender legs and smooth fair skin, with a curvaceous body and her long raven black hair which stretches all the way down to her curve of the back, still with the occasional tints of brown here and there which gives it a very unique look, she keeps it all let out which adds to her wild exotic look. Her eyes are still as green as ever and with a depth that could probably make most men fall of their chairs. She has some small and hardly noteworthy scars here and there on her back and also one more noteworthy scar at her wrist, these things only add even more to the wild side of her.
Her wild and exotic looks is probably enhanced even further by her unusual garments which consists of no ordinary clothes as she has shunned all kinds of clothes, instead she wears a sort of living apparel that consists of vines and leaves that lays close to her skin, just covering her most intimate parts since it would be an outrage and totally inappropriate to wear nothing even though she would probably do so if she was all alone. She also has a sturdy gnarled walking staff which she has proven to be quite deadly with as well if need be.
She has a very wild and exotic charm about her and her style of walking suggests a lot of attitude with a very fierce and animalistic look in her eyes.
Having a wild and tough charm she has realized that this is a very good way of keeping peoples stares and glances away and people would think twice before trying anything. She has come to an understanding with her magical nature as well, being an animist is the best thing that could have happened to her and she strongly feels connected with the nature.
She still has trouble getting along with most people as she is a woman of few words and rarely say more than a few words, her view of people is also quite hostile seeing as she has a very strong connection to the nature and would never let anyone harm nature unless it is for a good reason, she frowns on most people and their lack of respect towards mother nature. Other animist, elves and orcs are something she respects and those with likeminded view.
She sees herself as one with the nature and rarely leaves the nature unless there is something she has to attend.
Except for her wild charm and tough demeanor, she can be calm and kind most of the time when talking with her, but that can quickly change into a furious storm of natures wrath when dealing with people who desecrate nature or hunts animals for sport.
Reading books and such things have never been an interest for her, seeing as every time she tries to read the words just seem to dance and jump around for her, making her furious and annoyed.
When it comes to her use of magic she is exceptionally good at the nature arcana almost everything comes very natural for her and she can be quite a sight to behold when using the nature, she has a very aggressive way of using her string magic though, always trying to tug and pull her magic in a very strong manner which sometimes results in great and powerful magic but also abit wild. Her aptitude with the summoning arcana is not that bad either and usually she can do some impressive stuff there, mostly calling forth the more aggressive and wrathful beings of nature. The weather arcana she is very terrible at, usually her temper and furious way of using her magic makes the weather to chaotic and uncontrollable which at best might conjure up a tempest or a storm.
She prefers the nature arcana herself, using it as a tool and weapon against those who desecrate mother nature, she sometimes sees herself as an avenger of nature. She is particulary dangerous in forests and other kinds of natural habitats where she can show a great control and power of mother nature.
Animals and spirits is also something that intrigues her deeply and therefore she has developed a great interest in orcs and their shamans, wishing to learn more and hopefully one day visit an orc tribe and maybe stay there and learn even more about nature. Being a extreme nature lover she has also befriended an insect that she has as an companion, a small dangerous spider with deadly poison which she can command, sometimes the spider can be seen on her body crawling around the vines and leaves.
Ambitious description, all things considered and good coming from you. You’ve come a long way since you wrote your first description of Mordrek’s childhood =P
The part with the fat man is actually not logical. If she was a kid or even a teenager she would be executed or turned in as a Panling. No doubts or questions asked. It’s after all 2 gold crowns for a Panlings head. And since the starting age for this campaign is around 12-13 it’s not logical for her to be alive after a theft like that if not somebody could have vouched for her not being a Panling.
A suggestion here is that it was her head that was nearly cut off instead. This would make more sense and also the Mage would easily prove that she wasn’t a Panling and even if she was she still falls under the Magicka Law of potential Mages. If she is a Mage and a criminal she must be persecuted by them according to their law unless she is a proper citizen of a country sworn to that country’s god and regent.
But the wrist thing can work, but I just say it’s a little bit odd and enormously lucky, especially in Lanticka. Such a big city is even more corrupted since a lot of orphan kids is brought in by ship every day they are more a pest and who knows which of them are Panlings or not?
Other than that the background is mostly full of typos and things you have described wrongly. Like Marchon. You don’t have a strong Marchon since Marchon is not one thing but many. Her Marchon is strong. Or magic affiliation. Or connection to The Multiverse. But nothing big.
About your Vision, it’s okay but a little bit pale. I wanted to see some more… personality and character defects. It seems that the biggest defect or problem she has is reading and controlling the weather.
Also it isn’t that far a stretch from the original I think. Your character was a loner, and is a loner. She was a girl of few words, and she still is. She was wild, she is wild…
The vision should be radically different but still similar.
But like I said, it’s okay but not the best vision and not much to work with since the vision is meant to give the sessions their theme and make me help plan the development. Your characters vision has not much in that area. Most things are just “time goes on” and then you develop into a woman. =P
If you want to add or change, you can do so now. Otherwise I can say that a few “non-visible” traits will be added to your vision which will be kept secret until after the session where you should have encountered them.
Well, ill look into the vision abit more then, I kind of knew that it was abit short and maybe not the best.
How much time do I got with this? Just wanting to know if I should throw myself at it right away, im guessing you want it as soon as possible.. but any deadline? And should I post the changes here then? since its “out in the open” already?
I guess I kind of missed abit the point of radically different but still similiar, any pointers there? I mean a good example?
I would like to start creating the actual characters this week and the next so a deadline should be Sunday this week. The sooner the better.
Yes, post your changes and questions here please.
The best pointers I have concrete at the moment is Rasmus Vision. Read and try to see if you get the hang of it, otherwise ask me here again.
Well, I guess ive come up with some changes and such and I hope they are more suited.
Changed: In the orphanage you had to make friends and be one in the gang so to speak, otherwise you would never make it out in the streets. Katja didnt have trouble with this seeing as this was the only family she had ever known and would probably become friends for life. She was a quick study and learned quickly from the older children how to survive out in the streets, having a pretty charming personality she easily became one in the gang.
Changed: Days and weeks passed and things were going good, she was faster, taller and in pretty good physical shape for being a orphan and she was probably one of the best nowadays to steal and not getting caught. She also tried to make the life easier for the new kids by teaching them what she had picked up over the years and trying to cheer them up by bringing an extra snack now and then and occasionally playing some games, she really felt sympathy for them.
Now this was some changes to the background to give abit different personality in the beginning and making the vision more intact.
Vision changes:
Changed: Nowadays she is a woman of few words and has some real trouble getting along with anyone who doesnt share her views of nature. Although when she do say something she isnt one to hide her intentions. There are few people she respects except fellow animsts and orcs and elves seeing as they usually have a natural respect for nature. When she sees someone doing harm to nature, intentionally or unintentionally she sometimes let her deep green eyes linger on them making cringe and she has a way of making people feel inferior which isnt the best way to make friends.
Ok, well ill get back to you. hope this was atleast abit different. well well.
Good going, but still, the key points need editing